My first lesson of Chinese, I hope not the last!

If China needs 15 years to overtake American economy, I do have 15 years to learn Chinese, I guess it is the minimum.

The first lesson is "Hello". That, I learned already a long time ago in Beijing, but today I learned it is composed from "You" and "Good"; so you greet your Chinese neighbors saying "Are you good?" or more western "How are you?".

This is easy, I should learn how to say "Good bye" in the same lesson but I chose first to learn how to write it. I am lucky, Chinese simplified their traditional alphabet in the 50’s with the Pinyin alphabet!

To write Hello, you do not have to write: 你好 anymore but the much easier: 你好. I don’t see much difference! Fortunately, I am not the only one trying with this very important language so a system is given.

First “you”: Ní

And then “good” : hǎo

I knew it would be too much to learn “Good bye” in the same day but I was starting to wonder after learning “you” if trying “good” wouldn’t be overestimating myself either?

Then I discovered that what you learn to write is different from what is printed and actually the printed is easier

Then “you” should be written

but is printed






I like to say man prevails the machine but there are some exceptions! In the printed I can detail some characters, lines and curves that I can’t do in the written. Of course at the end, if you want to have just a little conversation, the transcription is enough and look very easy, it is just a tone situation!

Les Tons

Le Chinois Mandarin possède quatre tons plus un ton "plat".

Ton	Marque	Description
1er	dā	Haut et constant
2nd	dá	Commence par un ton médium et monte vers le ton haut
3ème	dǎ	Commence par un ton bas, descend vers les graves puis remonte vers le ton haut
4ème	dà	Commence par un ton haut et descend sèchement vers les graves
Neutral	da	Plat et sans expression

Variations de Tons

Un 3ème ton suivi immédiatement d'un autre 3ème ton se prononce comme un 2ème ton.

Nǐ hǎo = Ní hǎo

Is it really necessary to write if you can’t do it properly? The speaking is different; in international conversation the meaning is sometimes not as important as the will to show your respect for the culture of the interlocutor. So you say some unexpected politeness in the language of the other and then you are allowed to switch to English.

It was so hard to learn today how to write 你好 but so easy to learn to say “Hěn gāoxìng rènshi nǐ” which means “Please to meet you” or the even nicer “Ravi de faire votre connaissance”; and then I recognize the same nǐ as in Hello.

I knew it, it is all about you!

Did my dick got smaller?

Isn't it the scariest idea ever, who could occur to a man?

I am deeply convinced that the structure of our society is only based on domination. Christianity made us believe that the one being slapped could be stronger offering the second chick, but nowadays, in the great age of "über-capitalism", the stronger one is the one who slaps! Everything is about power and its most primitive expression is the penetration. This is a hard time for the ladies!
Yes, I deeply believe that equality between the genders is a sign of civilisation and countries where women are treated as inferior, are not socially developed as the one who do.
A surrendering city, who let the enemy penetrate in its wall, accepts domination; should someone being physically penetrated automatically socially dominated? No! You can control a part of my body but I control your brain and the way I like to be apparently dominated, because it gives me pleasure and at the end I decide when it starts and when it finishes. Unfortunately, it is not that simple in most of the world and even where it should be, the absolutism of porn culture from the tenderest ages makes people believe that the bigger is your dick and the more confident you should be!

And here I am, in the sauna of my exclusive gym, sweating in front of this young naked hunk exposing a huge “confidence”! He is playing being unreachable and ignoring my presence because he wants to be admired and seduced. This used to be a challenge to me, but I got older! I felt like I would admit my inferiority if I would get into that game! “Do you think you are looking better now than I was looking at your age? Will you look in my age as good as I do now? And if you go on spending so much time on your appearance, will you have any chance to express your own individuality instead of conforming yourself permanently to an average perception of beauty? I fold myself with my towel, hiding some unnecessary kilos and left the Adonis alone.
How old did I become to be so obsessed with age, appearance and youth!
No, I just recognized very late the capital that I had, that I did not take advantage of! I never tried to look good because I was looking good and getting the attention of people I liked. I realise now, when instead of me, shallow young persons get the attention of people I like, that my looks helped me in the past sometimes more than I admitted: “My beautiful thoughts were not as exciting as my beautiful thighs”
Today, in our global world, the cult of a very formatted beauty gives me the impression we went directly from the primitive Stone Age to the Plastic Age (of surgery!). Accepting it would be denying my first ideals of civilised society!
If I lost confidence in winning the battle of the appearance, does it really mean my dick got smaller? I don’t think so, I only justify myself by more intellectual means which do not vanish as fast as the looks!

Anyway, I still will trim my pubic hair a little better next time, it makes me looking bigger!

Das "Stabile" und das "Lustige", ein Versuch um die deutsche Kultur besser verstehen zu können vom April 2000! by Philippe Claude

Da "Kultur" schwer wahrnehmbar ist, ist sie auch schwer zu definieren. Bestimmte Einstellungen, intelektuelle oder künstlerische Schritte sind charakteristisch für bestimmte ethnische oder soziale Gruppen und somit kulturell definierend. Wenn eine kulturelle Gruppe (durch ihre Bedeutung oder Ghettoisierung) nicht mehr von einer anderen abhängig ist und sich selbst genügt, werden ihre Eigenheiten schließlich nicht mehr von der Gruppe wahrgenommen, da sie zur Norm geworden sind. So sind manche Frauen beleidigt, wenn man ihnen nicht die Tür öffnet, während andere sich weigern würden irgend eine Schwelle vor ihrem Mann zu übertreten. Die dominierende Kultur einer Welt, egal welcher Größenordnung (sei es eine Straße, eine Wohnung, eine Kirche oder auch ein Land, mehr noch eine halbe Erdkugel) definiert die gesellschaftlich angemessene Haltung, die trotz ihrer Besonderheit oft jedem einzelnen genauso kategorisch erscheint, wie Mord oder Inzest. Im Ausland zu leben ist eine besonders bereichernde Erfahrung: man lernt eine andere Kultur kennen und hat gleichzeitig genug Abstand, um die eigene mehr zu schätzen. Ich persönlich bin mir meiner eigenen Kultur durch das Leben in Deutschland bewußt geworden, während ich die deutsche Kultur in mannigfaltigsten, unerwarteten Situationen entdeckte. Die "Bar Jeder Vernunft" ist eher ein Tempel der Berliner Kultur, aber nichtsdestotrotz habe ich dort meine Theorie der nationalen Kultur entwickelt. Hat die Show begonnen, besteht meine Arbeit darin, die Ungestörtheit der Zuschauer und Künstler zu gewährleisten, daß heißt, mich um Außenstehende zu kümmern, die sich informieren oder einfach nur schnorren wollen. So fand sich eines abends, eine halbe Stunde vor dem Ende der Vorstellung ein konservativer Herr in den sechzigern ein, er trug einen marineblauen Kaschmirmantel. Seine Aktentasche legte die Vermutung nahe, daß er um 22:30 Uhr direkt von der Arbeit kam. Nach einer kurzen Unterredung, wußte ich daß er seine Frau abholen, und nach hause begleiten wollte und daß er geduldig im Vorzelt, das der "Bar Jeder Vernunft" als Foyer dient, warten würde. Der Eingang des Hauptzelts, ein leuchtend roter Moltonvorhang - der ein Bereich markiert, der nur mit einer Eintrittskarte betreten werden kann - wird von zwei robusten Stühlen undefinierbaren Stils flankiert, deren Leopardenpolster mich vage an Kolonialmöbel erinnern. Für meinen späten Besucher jedoch stellten sie etwas völlig anderes dar! Der, zu Unrecht, zwielichtige Ruf, den das Haus bei schlecht Informierten genießt, hat es oft auf eine Stufe mit irgendwelchen geschmacklosen Etablissements gestellt.
Diese Stühle erinnerten den alten Herrn keinesfalls an Kolonialzeiten, sondern bestimmt an etwas Vulgäres, das eigentlich in ein Bordell gehört. Die Müdigkeit nach einem so langen Arbeitstag führte ihn dazu, mich zu fragen, ob er in einem dieser Stühle Platz nehmen dürfe, um diesen Moment der Ruhe genießen zu können. Mir schien die Frage eher eine Geste der Höflichkeit und ich antwortete: "Bitteschön mein Herr!" Nachdem er sich gesetzt hatte, hellte sich das erschöpfte, abgespannte Gesicht plötzlich auf: er hatte es gewagt! Seine graue, trübe Alltagswelt war durch die Berührung mit der Phantasie durcheinandergebracht worden. Er befand sich mitten im Bühnenbild, auf dem Platz eines Schauspielers, er war ein Künstler!
Soviel Kühnheit durfte nicht ungestraft bleiben, dem Glück folgte die Panik. Seine beiden Hände, von Altersflecken bedeckt - in gewisser Weise passend zu den Bezügen - krallten sich verzweifelt an die Stuhlbeine, sein Gesicht verzerrte sich zu einer verschreckten Grimasse und mit zitternder Stimme fragte er mich: "Ist das stabil?" Ich verstand nicht sofort was er mir sagen wollte, aber ich fürchtete ihm ginge es nicht gut und wollte schon Hilfe besorgen. Ich sagte: "Wie bitte?" Verzweifelt wiederholte er: "Der Stuhl! Ist er stabil?" Aber sicher mein Herr, das ist zum Sitzen gedacht!" Etwas erleichert aber nicht ganz zuversichtlich, der anfängliche Moment des Reizes schien weg! Gedanken wie etwa "Und wenn mich ein Bekannter hier sieht?" oder "Wie stehe ich da, wenn der Stuhl am Ende doch nicht hält?" mußten ihm durch den Kopf gegangen sein; die verlorene Unbekümmertheit sollte sich nicht wieder einstellen, die kurze Atempause vom Alltagsstress war verdorben! Das unerklärliche Benehmen meines Gegenübers machte mich stutzig. Das Ganze hatte kaum mehr als eine Minute gedauert und ich versuchte immer noch zu verstehen, was passiert war, als mir plötzlich ein Licht aufging: der Stuhl war lustig, also konnte er unmöglich stabil sein! Dieser Mann schien mir jetzt wie eine Karikatur des germanischen Geistes. Die Dinge müssen stabil sein, sie müssen so funktionieren wie sie gedacht sind und zwar so präzise und lange wie möglich. Dieses stabile Universum, in dem Überraschungen nicht willkommen sind, streift seltsammerweise ein lustiges Universum, in dem man während seiner Freizeit Abenteuer erlebt und wo alles nicht länger als ein Lachen dauert. Erheitern gilt als Entschuldigung für mangelnde Stabilität. Weder stabil, noch amüsant sein, heißt auf einen Platz im deutschen Kulturraum verzichten. Wenn das "Stabile" eher dem Bereich Arbeit zuzuordnen ist und das das "Lustige" der Freizeit, so gibt es doch zahllose Wechselbeziehungen zwischen beiden, wie der Stuhl beweist, es gibt erheiternde Dinge die nicht weniger stabil sind. Zum Beispiel ich: auch wenn ich einen niedlichen Akzent habe und mein Verhalten manchmal unerwartet scheint - was mich als "lustig" kategorisiert-, schätze ich die Stabilität , ja ich brauche sie sogar. Seit 15 Jahren ziehe ich mich gleich an, benütze Parfum einer Marke und bin einem Elektonikhersteller treu geblieben. Ganz zu schweigen von meinen sozialen Gewohnheiten, es sind die selben!

Philippe Claude übersätzt von Alexzandra Ahlborn (April 2000)

The boredom and the fear

Discovering a new country became much more difficult because of consume and medias.

We need to think fast and multitask and therefore we need short cuts to save time. For example, you watch some James Bond movie and he is suddenly in Paris. Most of the case you’ll see a panorama of Paris with the Eiffel Tower. You still don’t know why he is in Paris but in one second you have the information about what must have take at least five hours (I do not understand the James Bond movies, I love them for the style and the attitude but I never get the intrigue and why there is so much travelling in them. It must be too British for me!). If you watch a “Sex And The City” movie, you will see from the bridge “Alexandre III” the beautiful dome of the “Invalides” and hear few notes of a Edith Piaf song. It will take few seconds more because Carrie loves Paris and she is not in a spying operation but the result is the same, Parisian culture is reduced to some clichés which define tourism (creating a lot of currency venues) . I didn’t take Paris as example only because I grew up there but also, as a matter of a fact, because it is still the biggest touristic city in the world. So every day, people ask me why I left Paris “Such a beautiful city!” – “Ah, you like Paris?” – “Oh, I never been there, but would love to go!” For me it just means: another victim of clichés. In 2010, I guess you can spend one week in Paris just seeing things you already saw in movies and in the same time spending two months of salary. At the end of course I prefer the clichés about Paris than the one about Calcutta but the only explanation I can give to their persistent existence is the fear. I mean if you would know the real Paris, you should be afraid but I am talking about the fear of the difference and how comforting it is to stay in an area where you know everything, even if it is not the truth.

I was born curious and social so I can surmount the fear but I appreciate my frame of references (where I can define myself in front of others and where I feel comfortable)! I try to readjust my frame after every new experience of differences, and if I cannot profit of them in my surrounding, I normally, can better understand and respect. Unfortunately, most of the tourists are afraid of confronting something difficult to understand, even if it could be a much more fulfilling cultural experience. There I must admit (my German friends will hate me) Germans are the worse. They are the worse because they travel the most (I am not that well informed about the Japanese way but it might be comparable). They have this stupid show on TV where they follow teenagers who left Germany for one year of education. Normally, after six weeks they always have “Heimweh”, they miss their “Salzkartoffeln” and “Rostbraten”. This is the moment I am waiting for and I really enjoy, how the little fifteen years old Tanja from the “Ruhrgebiet” will manifest her own “Heimweh Gefühl”? Be realistic, Germans invented the idea of being “Home sick” and “Heimat” is a word with a very controversial history!

I was always so happy to be able to leave Paris that I never missed it; even after seventeen years I still do not miss it. Of course there are few little things that I really enjoy in Paris and that I can’t have in Berlin but what would be the point of feeling unhappy missing them somewhere they don’t belong. I try to recognize and enjoy this Parisian “Je ne sais quoi” while I’m there. Those things are very far from the clichés. I love walking the “Rue Montorgueil” at 7.30 p.m, before the closing of the bakery, and queue for fifteen minutes for half a baguette. The bakery next door is totally empty and cheaper but the waiting is not important because the bread is so delicious! This is for me a very Parisian moment which can’t be sold in a travel agency and tells as much as the Eiffel Tower on the culture. Talking about the Eiffel Tower, nobody knows that it was the tallest building in the world when it was built, exactly like the World Trade Center in its times. Culturally, nations building the tallest buildings are arrogant and try to show their supremacy to the others, and so was France. Then why those tons of iron design by Gustave Eiffel should be romantic today? Because romantic is not threatening and does sell good!

So, back to the Germans, they are obsessed with leaving their country* and once they finally found the missing sun, they start to miss little details from their daily life without being able to enjoy the little details from the life of those they visit. Why do they travel that much then? Because the boredom! All of us, western privileged capitalistic products, we don’t need to fight to survive, we are living well but we are bored, so we need entertainment and for this we are ready to give all our savings. We love the “Panem et circensem” but we don’t want to be in the arena with the lions, we want to sit comfortably in our sofas, eating chips and to have the best view on the show. Those ones are not Aborigines anymore, they are in an acting school and they make a little money during the holiday break! As I was visiting India, I needed six month, I was a “Traveler” but we, ”Travelers”, we would contempt the ”Tourists” who would pretend seeing India in two weeks. The problem is that a trip to Rajasthan for retired people from Miami or a visit of the Backwaters of Cochin for some French bourgeois from Paris is much more valuable that some European pot head who did just flunk his studies and want to stay the cheapest and the longest high on the beach! The consume society profit of bringing us passive in front of the big screen. We are directly there, it is in 3D, and we could touch it if we wanted but we built an invisible fence; we can see them but they can’t approach us, we are not in danger!

-“Does anyone want some ice cream?”

* Actually, there is a text in Latin from a monk from the fifteen century telling that they invented the modern concept of tourism. Already at that time the ancestors of our friends were going to Venice, maybe not for their honeymoon, but just to visit. The artistic Venetians were hiding themselves thinking they would be eaten or burned (or both), seeing those Teutonic monsters coming; but instead of that they wanted to buy little souvenirs to bring back home. Once the masters of the “Renascimento” sold all their repairing tools and kitchen utensils, they start to produce very cheap ones without any possible use just for the “Export”. I guess those souvenirs were “Kaputt” very fast once home and back then it would be decided to make good quality “Made in Germany”!

Australia is at the end of the world!

I love to tell a “bon mot” from the very beginning of the European unity formation. In 1961, de Gaulle, Eisenhower and Churchill organize the first summit to start a commune economy for France, West-Germany and England. At the last minute Churchill cancel his venue because a storm is blowing in his country. Listening to this new, Charles de Gaulle says: “Of course, British people have storms, they live on an island!” Those words, describing a geographic situation that everybody knew, told by the French president in this context were dramatic. He just decided that European politic would be based in Bonn and Paris and that London would be only a satellite of it. Fifty years later, almost nothing changed, they still have storms in England!

First the coins, left you’ve got the two dollars coins and they are twice smaller as the one dollar coins. It’s getting worse two dollars are physically a quarter of a fifty cent coin and the same size as a five cent coin!

Money is a basic sign of national identity so we do respect this different detail and sometimes the Australians are not rude so, when you want to pay, you just have to take all your coins in your hand and they pick what they need. Not a big deal!

But much more life endangering is the way they drive cars; they drive on the left side! How is this possible? If you are lucky they write on the street “Look right”, “Look left”, but sometimes nothing is written and then you turn desperately in every direction your head, you try also to hear if a car could come and then you just run because the danger is everywhere. This nonsense can happen only on an island. When right is right then left must be wrong!

I wrote already how annoyed I was by the higher prices but now I discovered how amazed I could be by all the free things; and it is for sure a much more positive way of thinking!

- First, there is clean toilet for free everywhere. I mean really free, nobody waiting with a little plate telling you how respectful it would be to leave him fifty cents. I drink too much tea and I find myself permanently in very embarrassing situation in public. Here, “No worries”! there is always in the next 500 meters a Female and Male facilities possibility. I love the Male Call!

- Then the museums. If twenty five dollars are a normal entrance fee, there is often a free admission part, or a free admission day which is very enjoyable, let’s say “Lovely”!

- Then the tip. When tip is not forbidden, it doesn’t look like obligatory. Of course when almost everywhere they give you some blinking pager to pick up yourself your dish when it is ready, the idea of service must be a bit different. I don’t mind, I love to sneak in professional kitchens to see how they work!

Of course there is plenty of others that I‘ve already discovered and some I didn’t but this is not the point, it is all about the awareness of it. Why can’t I see the Fantastique when it is all around?

It is a lot of work, they live at the end of the world!

Talking about myself

I see more and more people writing diaries by hand on precious little notebooks and I don’t know why teenagers decide to write by hand on the 21st century. In the time of computers, cell phones and blogs, writing by hand seems so old fashioned. Yes, that’s the point, it gives importance to what you write; it makes it, when it is not necessary, almost intellectual already at the beginning. I remember in the 80’s when anybody going to Germany would have to bring back five Mont Blanc pens because they were so much cheaper there. We had checkbooks at the time and we would ostensibly take the white stared pen out of our pockets and, whatever would be the amount we would write, it would seem so chic! I have seven at home, five Meisterstück (do you write an E at the end when it is plural, anyway do not forget the “Umlaut”) and two fantastic from the 50’s; I didn’t use them since 1993, my awakening to computer life!
Do I want to keep the “Zwischenablage”??? No, no, no, I have nothing to do with those barbaric things! Delete! And suddenly my whole text about “The worth of things” disappeared; ironically it didn’t have so much worth! I am here, trying to write again my fantastic text and it is not as good as it was before, and I wish I would have written my text by hand. But vintage is only for the young ones who didn’t experience the original; otherwise it looks like desperate nostalgia: “It used to be so much better before!”
The only thing you are missing is the power of your beauty which faded away and that you were not clever enough to compensate by other ways! You should remember how much you suffered, how much time you lost and how many mistake you did because you were so young; but you can’t because the only thing you can remember is how many eyes were following any of your steps whenever you entered a room!
My only notebook has a keyboard, not a pen!
That’s the moment where I could start about the new “absolutism” of the binary society but I wanted to introduce interactivity in my blog (Micky renounced to take part of it but savors any of my entry!) Both are correlated but let’s put things in order, first the interactivity! There is plenty of people who talk about themselves in the street, normally they shout, are drunk and homeless. Nobody understands them and nobody wants; I do not want to look like one of them! Internet created new ways of communication which sometimes could be interpreted like isolation. Some others go at the end of the world and spend hours on Facebook with their 500 “Friends” back home, and are not able to start a conversation with someone in the same hotel lobby! They can be compared; they only express themselves (or cannot) in different times. So, I have so many things to write which are not only about myself, they are also about my world, and I share a part of it with you (yes, I can be extremely social!). I don’t want people to think like me (what for a torture!), but I want to prove people it makes sense to think different than they do and that could be an extension of their own thoughts. It needs to be entertaining and you know better than me what entertains you. So, here is the deal, I will try to put a section on the blog where I could list all the crazy subjects which are coming to my mind and that I don’t have the time to write in the same time. I am producing a huge work (four hours and one liter tea for every computer page), and interesting you give me more pleasure than to bore you. The only feedback I got is from people I totally admire (Deborah Cole, you are a goddess!) and already heard “de visu” all my deliriums, so I need the opinion of the others, what they like and what they don’t like. I feel that my possible readers could not dare to say something because it wouldn’t be on the level. Which level? I can read perfectly French, English, German or Spanish (or at least I have a translation option in my computer), so tell me in your words what could be interesting to you, and I will try to challenge you with my words!
Next blog’s entries:
- The new “Absolutism” of the binary society (thoughts about computers, Joseph Beuys and the digital revolution)
- The “Doppelganger” society (what 20.000 people dancing by Oprah Winfrey the choreography of “I’ve got a feeling”, the Black Eyed Peas smash hit, 150 George Michael parading at the Sydney Mardi-Gras with the real one in the middle and 5200 naked people posing for Spencer Tunick, have in common)
- The directions of the communication (writing or talking, the trace of our expressions and the definition of politeness in a social surrounding)
- The day when the grass got greener (nothing to do with Australia, but how I got rid of a part of my heavy past)
- My dream with Madonna (again nothing to do with Australia but how is based my respect for extraordinary people without admiring their work)
- Architecture in Australia (how, in the same Australian city, you can feel like in New York, Brighton or a little village from a John Wayne movie)
- Australian money (how the size of the Australian coins already define another perception of the currency; or what you pay and what you get for free is very different in every country, it could be cultural)